Terms that I have invented

Academic Friday: Thursday on college and university campuses.  With the switch from the quarter system to the semester system, many colleges and universities no longer have classes meet on Fridays.  As a result, many professors and instructors are not on campus on Fridays because they are all hungover; Thursday night is the beginning of their weekend.

Conspicuous Education: The use of large or rarely used words and/or phrases in order to demonstrate your level of education, or to make someone else think that you are smarter than you really are.  Best example: supercalifragilisticexpialidocious.  Primarily used by academics and those in government and/or politics.  Or Mary Poppins fans.

Economic Schizophrenia: The tendency for reports and statistics about the state of the economy to contradict one another.  Usually occurs while comparing reports issued by a private sector firm to reports issued by a government entity; or while comparing reports issued by two different government entities; or while comparing two different reports issued by the same government entity.  Because government is crazy that way.

Idiocracy: rule by idiots, morons, and others with a below-average level of intelligence.  (Ok, I didn’t come up with that one, Mike Judge did.)

Reverse Monet: a girl who doesn’t look that attractive from a distance, but who becomes more attractive the closer you get to her.  This is the opposite of a Monet, a girl who looks good from a distance but gets less attractive as you get closer to her.

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Categories: Humor

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